I am an optimist. I want to be a happy person. I want my mood to be up far more than it is down. I believe that we create the life and atmosphere we desire to live in. There are people who choose to live in drama and misery. Somehow I believe that is their bliss. (I don't get it, but it can be entertaining to watch...)
Which brings me to my present mood. It is not a bad mood, but it is a mood I am not enjoying especially. I am in worry mode... specifically I am scared shitless about my new job. I am not good with transition periods of life and I am about to be in a big one with this career change. While I am excited to begin and know I will ultimately love it... in the meantime I am stressed out. Normal? Of course. Easy? Not so much.
I can think logically about it and know that in a month or so I will be fairly comfortable in my new job and my life will feel balanced and "normal". It is the meantime that I don't like.
Don't get me started about the fact that I take my board exam on Tuesday. That is certainly on my mind. I am studying and preparing as much as I can, but I will be so happy to have that behind me. Good Lord please let me pass the first time!!!!
My personal life is pretty cool. I have great friends and I feel happy in that area except for the lack of a man part. It is quite discouraging, but I remain OPTIMISTIC that he is still out there.
Blah, blah, blah.. Have I said anything earth shattering? Certainly not, but the writing helps.
Now if I could just get laid.
Change is good :)
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